The secret is out: You desperately want to take care of yourself, but you are sick of the side-order of guilt that comes with it every time you “treat yourself” or get in a routine that makes you feel good.
Ok… so you do certain things here & there for yourself that fit into your schedule ok, but only because those things don’t sacrifice what everyone else needs from you.
Hence, the dreaded “I feel bad doing this” if you participate in anything outside the norm of people being able to rely on you like usual.
Wanting to do yoga more consistently, stick to a workout program long enough to see the difference in your arms or finally adding that color to your hair knowing that you can commit to keeping up with your roots every 4 weeks is way easier said than done.
What is up with that?
It’s simple. We’ve bought into a few fibs our society told us… and our mothers… & mother’s mothers. & We’ve bought it hook, line & sinker.
I say “we” because I felt bad & guilty for this self-care stuff for a long time too.
Than, I started making connections and those connections revealed these 3 things to me over the years:
- Society taught us that self care is selfish.
The definition of selfish includes “lack of consideration for others.”
Wheras self care has a connotation of caring. When you care, you are thoughtful of those around you. When you take good care of yourself you are in an even better position to help others. You have the energy, the drive and the focus because being your best self brings out the best in others.
- Society taught us to seek permission.
Once you are past your teenage years, you don’t need mom & dad to tell you it’s ok for you to get a massage on a regular basis. The only permission you need is the one given for YOU by YOU. If you think you need a professional expert opinion to grant you the “ok” in order for you to take stellar care of yourself, consider that permission granted! Truth is, you DO NOT require it from someone outside of yourself. That’s just an illusion.
- Society taught us that we don’t deserve it.
There is nothing you need to do to earn self care. You are worthy of taking care of yourself and the simple notion of questioning this whole concept will give you the courage and the confidence to officially claim it.
The last piece is really what stops the first 2 from happening. When my clients have gone to work on their “self worth & deserving factor” their self care fell into place naturally and guilt became a thing of the past.
Think about YOURSELF holiday season:
- Self care means you care about others enough to care about yourself FIRST.
- You already have permission to take good care of yourself.
- You deserve all the good that comes with practicing to self care!